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Cold Hard Rants

A Whole lot of Hype, a Whole lot of Bore

Montreal, Quebec was best summed up by the good people at Maxim Magazine as a city that specializes in Swedish talent at Mexican prices. Rarely has a city been described so accurately and succinctly as the people at Maxim managed to do in describing Montreal. Just last night, independent of anything, I described Montreal using glowing terms. Simply, it has everything. Culture, restaurants, a vibrant nightlife, and for the red blooded male (or female—no discrimination here at CHR), some of the most stunning women east of Winnipeg. It is hard to go to Montreal, and leave there with less than a hangover, some incredible memories, and the desire to return very soon.

Unfortunately, come this Friday night, Montreal won’t be the headquarters for fun and excitement in Canada, rather it will be the headquarters for illogical hype, and extreme boredom. I am speaking of course about the 2009 NHL Entry Draft.

As with all drafts, there are great unknowns. As with all drafts, an inordinate amount of time is spent analyzing and evaluating and speculating. The question I ask, is why? Why focus all this time, energy, and analysis on players who are just as likely, if not more likely, to be duds then superstars. Can you imagine if we spent this much time speculating on the best law students, med students, and culinary arts students?

Announcer one, “In watching video, I didn’t like that med student’s bedside manner”

Announcer two, “That’s going to cost him his first round pick—looks like he is destined to do his residency in Sault Ste. Marie now”

It’s utter nonsense that all this effort is spent on analyzing 16, 17, and 18 year olds. You want to know why we should all be saving our breath? Because we are talking about 16, 17, and 18 year old boys, and I don’t think I need to tell any of the readers of this fine column that those are some unpredictable ages, at best.

Come Friday night, undoubtedly there will be many people who will not venture outside and will instead spend their time in front of TSN watching the draft. Good for them if that’s what they choose. To me, the draft is just another day, and certainly does not constitute required viewing. I am a firm believer in the “what have you done for me recently” axiom. And in the case of NHL draft picks, they have done nothing for me lately. Call me when they perform in the NHL. Until then, I will be happy to sit on a patio, enjoy the sunshine and short skirts and miss the draft.

For Illegal Curve, I am Drew Mindell.

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This week, we unveil, live on-air, the Illegal Curve mock draft of the entire first round.