An Open Letter to Dany Heatley

Dear Mr. Heatley,

Oh Dany, or Daniel if that is your real name, why do you continue to mock me?  We had such high hopes from you coming to the Sens in a blockbuster deal once the lockout ended.  Although your skating was just a hair better than Jason Spezza’s, we still cut you some slack since you managed to keep finding the back of the net 50 times each year – that is until this past season.

Although initially seen as a minor bump in the road, you were moved to the second powerplay unit by coach Clouston, and wouldn’t you know it we started winning a few more games?  Only for reality to set in shortly after, when we were officially eliminated from playoff contention.  But to go all Alexei Yashin on us, and refuse to play on our team again?  I didn’t see that one coming.  I think you’ve been hanging out with the Lindros’ too much lately.

If this situation turns out in our favour as the Yashin situation did, well then thank you. We were ever so lucky to fleece then-Isles GM Mike Milbury in that deal, but to think we will be able to get talent equivalent to a first rounder (Spezza) AND Chara for your crybaby attitude – think again.  You have put Bryan Murray in such a situation by making your trade demands public, that he cannot possibly come out on top.

When you first arrived in Hot-Lanta, you were immediately put on the point on the powerplay, with quartbacking instincts that are quite rare amongst forwards.  Then came that unfortunate summer day of the accident, and your knee has never been the same since.  I dared to dream that these skills would somehow manage to re-surface in our nation’s capital.  I can’t blame you for demanding out of Atlanta after the horrific incident; a change of scenery was definitely needed.  But to pull the same crybaby stunt to get out of Ottawa because you had second powerplay duties?  Maybe you should have started playing better than Jesse Winchester.  Ever think about that one?

Sure, the names of Frolov, O’Sullivan, and Marleau have been tossed around, but c’mon, how could we possible get back someone of your POTENTIAL.  I guess the only silver lining in this whole situation is that Hossa really layed an egg in the finals this year.

Have fun on the West Coast away from hockey’s limelight.  Let me know if you can now make the first PP unit.

Sincerely,

The Sens Army
A.k.a. one distraught Illegal Curve contributor